The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Damn victory sex feels great
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
