She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
