And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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