I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
