Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
