i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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