..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
My penis needs a shock collar
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
