Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
