What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I think my vagina is haunted
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
