no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
