i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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