i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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