dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
