Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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