he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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