my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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