I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
