I wanna bring you to show and tell
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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