wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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