no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
