i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
