so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize