idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
