Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
