ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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