her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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