Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
this just has baby written all over it
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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