Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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