Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
