If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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