I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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