just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Randomize
