Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
My dad is sitting where you rode me
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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