So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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