Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
