Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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