I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
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