gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
