im drinking this country out of the recession.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
