I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
