I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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