ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
