It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
