I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
