do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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