I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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