He is an equal opportunity slut.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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