Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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