Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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