i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
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